January: New Goals, New Ways to Guarantee Success

January: New Goals, New Ways to Guarantee Success January 2020 It’s January! Time to set all the new goals that you’re going to commit to for the next year month! Let’s face it…we set goals in January that we plan to stick to for the year, but by February we’ve either “failed” or forgotten about almost all of them. Why is there such a high rate of “failure” when it comes to New Year’s Resolutions? I have a theory it’s because of these two things:

1 – We’re not honest with ourselves. Maybe we’re not being honest about what we really want to change vs what we feel like we’re supposed to change. Do you really, truly, genuinely want to add exercise to your life, or do you just know you’re “supposed” to? Or maybe we’re not honest with ourselves about what goals are realistic. Have you ever set a goal to add exercise, meditation, healthy food prep, and volunteering into your already-packed schedule, and then wonder why you’re not able to fit everything in?

2 – We spiral into shame at the first “failure.” If we set a goal to go to the gym every Monday, and then we miss the second Monday in January, most of us tend to spiral into negative self-talk and shame (“I knew this wouldn’t last…I can never do this…I’m such a failure…”). Try to think of your goals as an aim that you’re taking, with room for mistakes and blunders. No big deal if you missed a Monday, just try again! All of this is easier said than done, so take your goals with you to your next therapy appointment, and get the support you need to make them work this year (or at least be more gentle and kind to yourself if they don’t!).